Apr 30, 2015

The balls are no longer inert.

Vegeta! what does the Scouter say about Toriyama's Apology for GT Levels?

We're getting a new Freaking Dragon Ball Show, because of the Resurrection of Freeza or something.

In any case, Toei is giving us MORE DRAGONBALL and we can forget about Goku becoming a kid then having hair grow in weird places... Also, Good bye to Omega Shenron and the other GT stuff...

That's the canonical order now...

I hope you're ready for:

Power Up grunts...

Yamcha being Useless...

Krillin getting his ass kicked. (Team FourStar does a nice job of counting this on their Abridged parody.)

People talking about Balls.

Now THIS may be what gets me back into anime... I backed away after I saw card games on Motorcycles being a thing.

Hopefully this will also function as an apology for this:

Apr 28, 2015

Matty's Beasts of Burden Sale... Oh my!

Need a Griffin, or 3? Well better head to Matty Collector on May 1st in order to take advantage of their "BEASTS OF BURDEN" Sale... For 24 Hours, they'll have a whopping 15% off on each of the following beasts:

Battle Lion
Battle Cat

But to call upon the Spirit of the Late Billy Mays...


So, let's do math:

Griffin and Battle Cat are $35 each. Arrow and Battle Lion are $42 each.
On this sale: Griffin and Battle Cat are $29.75 each. Arrow and Battle Lion are $35.70 each.
If you get 3 or more Griffins or Battle Cats they'd cost $28. Meanwhile if you get three or more Arrows (dunno, WHY you'd need 3 Arrows) or 3 Battle Lions they'd cost $33.60 each.

You'd have to add the Digital River Shipping and Handling charges to the mix in order to decide if this is a deal or a pass. While I'd love to get 3 more griffins because Army Building; my toy cash is a bit low. Also, If they had shadow beast, MAYBE I'd try to get a few... even if it kills my toy budget.

It came from the toy chest: Sprite Ape likes 7Up

Guess who is going to come out of the Toy Chest for the OFFICIAL MOTU DAY? I'll give you a hint...

No, it's not a My Little Pony character... Listen to Princess Sunbutt!
But I wouldn't call him a Beeeytch who likes Mmmmmm Bananas!
I'm talking about the Barbarian Ape, Gygor. Evil Monk... err Ape who doesn't like He-Man, Oo-Larr, Beastman and he killed Vykor... Johnny Cage Style!

Something something Evil Lyn released the dude. (In my Fanon, Gygor becomes EL's Bodyguard.)
Evil Lyn: The fact that you fear him, makes me
want to release him more.

Beastman: He was my High School Bully! Used to
give me swirlies twice a day!

Evil Lyn: And you DO stink up Snake Mountain
worse than Stinkor when wet... But I want
a Yellow and Green Ape as my Bodyguard!

I know I was VERY against the guy in MOTUC, but he exists, was a gap in my collection. Found one at a reasonable price, so I bought him.

So, here I am reviewing the Ape... who is VERY HEAVY for a Rotocast Torso BTW

This buck is NOT THE NORMAL MOTUC BUCK... This leads me to test his articulation. If he can pull off two Gorilla specific poses, he'd be a success.
Pose 1: Fail! OK, so he can ALMOST Pull it off if it wasn't for the V-Cut feet and no knee Articulation. Surprisingly the feet are balljointed.
Evil Lyn: Now Gygor, is it with a soft G
or a hard G sound? If you behave
you'll get a lot more bananas in chip

Gygor: *Gorilla noises*

Pose 2: Fail! a Gorilla toy who can't do the Gorilla chest bump should be ashamed of itself... Bandai was able to pull off a Kong that can do it... then again this was BanDai Japan.

Paint and Sculpt:
He looks very Ape-like. Similarities to Grodd and other Apes sculpted by the FourHorsemen are purely coincidental. there seems to be some slight slop on mine. Luckily it's covered by the cape.

Me: A little help here, Oo-Larr, he's going
to kill me! HURRY!

Oo-Larr: By the Goddess! It's an Ape!
I must ride it!

Me: Just get him off of me!
Huge ASS Axe. Should I count the somewhat removable armor as accessories?

Me: Eat Laser you damn dirty ape!
Oo-Larr: That's racist!
Me: I wasn't talking about Gygor!
Gygor gets a 3.0 as his score. It's not bad, but I am disappointed in his limited Articulation... Let's face it, this character was made because it could be reused from Shadow Beast parts... Now to get a reasonably priced Shadow Beast... Tytus and Megator are still skippable for me. Procrustus MAY BE the only one I get... but that's got to wait until Shadow Beast is in my hands...

Damn! I can't believe I went so long without doing a Congo reference...

I must amend a mistake on this review. My dear assistant, Spike noticed something that I did not. After stripping him of his armor and reassembling his feet (after they popped off on their own)
He CAN do the Knuckle Walk pose... It's not perfect, but it's close enough. This means that his score must change accordingly.

Updated Articulation score: 3.5 because he CAN Pull off the Knuckle Walk. Sadly the chest pounding is still off limits and that killed all my Amy Good Gorilla jokes.

This new Articulation sculpt means that his final score needs revisiting. 3.33 is the new score for him.

Apr 27, 2015

Girl Meets World is about to jump the shark.

I've ranted about this before a few times.

Well, looks like the Girl Meets World Writers ARE READY to have the show jump the shark!
The link is to a tweet by the GMW writers and I quote:
Next: Feeny, Shawn, Eric, Angela, Mr. Turner, Minkus, Mrs. Minkus, Harley, Morgan. How about Jack, Rachel, Frankie, Joey, Eli? Who'd I miss?
 OK. We knew Feeny and Eric were coming. So was Angela (unfortunately). Minkus and Mrs. Minkus are understandable since Farkle is the Son of Minkus. Harley is the School Janitor on girl Meets World and Janitor Bud did make a few appearances on Boy Meets World; so it makes sense that every once in a while on a school-centric episode we get to see the Janitor. BTW, I just realized this: Mr. Feeny voiced the Original KITT on Knight Rider. Eric voices Bumblebee on the latest Transformers Robots in Disguise... Both Eric and Feeny have been Talking Cars!! Ka-Chow!! Last but not least Morgan, who makes sense to show up eventually, because she's Riley's Aunt.

Now the ones the writers are suggesting:

He KINDA was Topanga's friend. The Eric Hollywood episode had this B Story about the Hunters getting Chicken pox and Topanga helping them get over it. Not to mention him being Shawn's brother can almost help him have greater chances of appearing. (Chances would improve IF Shawn ends up becoming Maya's stepfather.)

NOT NEEDED. She was Topanga's college roommate for a while, but that's not reason enough to show up on Girl Meets World. IF she married Jack, then that could help her have some more validity to appear on Girl Meets World (aside from being a Boy Meets World character.)

Frankie the Enforcer and Joey the Rat: TOTALLY NOT NEEDED. the end.

Eli Williams: Media Relations Teacher at John Adams High. Good friend of Jonathan Turner. If the rumors about Mr. Turner becoming a teacher at John Quincy Adams High, then his good pal and Media Relations Teacher could show up... I mean It's not like he's being targeted by the CW to appear on the CW's Flash...

Oh well, he does have a target on his back... and I spoke too soon... While HE COULD appear, he isn't REALLY NEEDED TO.

The thing that bugs me, and I've said before is: Bringing Peripheral Boy Meets World characters into the fold pushes the focus away from Riley. The further we move FROM RILEY, we lose the focus of the show... GIRL (Riley) MEETS WORLD.

Apr 25, 2015

It Came from the Toy Chest: I wish I had an Angel

Sorry for Triggering some Alone in the Dark flashbacks... the movie, not the game.
But it was either making a reference to the Nightwish song from that movie, or go again with the already used MILF joke... while dealing with the next figure... Queen Angella, aka Glimmer's mom!
Right out of the bat I must tackle an issue with MOTUC Queen Angella figures in general...

There's a lot of Angella figures flying around wall-eyed... Mattel doesn't know what went wrong... Luckily mine arrived and her Strabismus is mild.
So, for the uninformed, yes, she is Glimmer's mom and the Queen of Bright Moon. The first Kingdom to be liberated by the Great Rebellion... Mostly because Bow and Glimmer are from Bright Moon, but details...

Let's check out the MOTUC Queen Angella:

The Queen has the standard MOTUC FEMALE 2.0 ARTICULATION, which means no boot cut, but we have a waist cut. In addition to her Normal Articulation she has the wings that are a reuse of the DCUC Hawkgirl or Hawkman... not sure whose wings are these... Mostly because I don't own DCUC Hawkman or Hawkgirl. The point is that those wings have MORE Articulation than say, Swift Wind's wings.

That allows the queen to be in some dynamic poses as well as some at rest poses... 4.5

Paint and Sculpt:
 I already mentioned her slight wall-eyedness on mine... It kinda looks like she was a character from an Eroge during a massive H-Scene... Yeah... let's move on. Aside her Eye issue, the rest of the paintwork seems fine. Sculptwise, well she's got the Filmation look with some toy details, just enough to make her similar to Glimmer, but different enough... One TINY Nitpick, She is a bit too short when standing next to her daughter... or I should say Glimmer has REALLY LONG LEGS...
So, for display reasons keep the mother away from the daughter. 4.5

She has a Vintage Toy Halo that in my case went straight to the extra parts baggie #6 in the Extra parts drawer. She also has a Sword inspired by Filmation. I kinda wish she had something else...

Dear Diary: Jackpot!

Angella gets a 4.17 which is a decent score. If she hadn't gotten the Derpy Face and maybe come with an Extra accessory, she could have scored higher.

With her we complete Wave 1 of Princess of Power AND we're 2 figures short of completing The Great Rebellion. I still can't believe that we're a Peekablue (coming this Summer) and a Perfuma (coming most likely in Q4)

Also in unrelated news, La La Land Records sent my my replacement discs.

Apr 24, 2015

Odds and ends 04-24-2015: Tyler Perry, Disney, and Everybody loves Raymond.

When Peter Boyle died, I was a bit bummed, but it was understandable. He was about 71 years old. But today I found out that Sawyer Sweeten (One of the kids who played one of  the twins on Everybody loves Raymond... Geoffrey Barone) has died of what it seems a suicide.

My condolences to the Family. It's a shame that the kid had to kill himself, but we don't know what pushed him to do that.

Bunk'd is the name of the Jessie Spin-off. So, all the Ross kids, except Luke end up in some sort of summer camp in Maine, where their parents (adoptive in the case of Zuri and Ravi) met as teenagers.
Sp, I'm guessing Fish out of Water situation for the Ross kids, especially Emma. meh.

Oliver Queen is going to play Stephen Amell with Sports Equipment... or vice versa... I know this bit of news is a bit old about Arrow being Casey, but I didn't want to go right out of the bat with BAXTER STOCKMAN being recast and played by:

Yes, Tyler Perry will be Baxter Stockman... Now part of me kinda wishes MADEA had been cast as Baxter Stockman...
Roll the other Oprah clip, Spike!

speaking of over 9000... Stinkor was a Breezie in MLP and he also played this small role on DBZ (the Ocean Dub)
Even Rainbow Dash is into Fluttershy Day.
Yes, April 24th, 2015 is Fluttershy Day... on the US
Happy Fluttershy day!

Apr 22, 2015

Matty News, the good, the bad, and the Ugly...

There has been a huge issue with Queen Angella figures suffering from
Strabismus. So, many people have complained about the issue, with reason.

Since Scott Toyguru Neitlich is no longer with Mattel, we have no one to direct fan rage to.

Luckily Mattel seems to have heard those of us who have gotten a Queen Derpgella figure... (Here's hoping that mine arrives OK.) and this is what they had to say:

I shall copy and paste the quote for those who are Matty Impaired.

I wanted to let you know that you're not being ignored and your cries have not gone unheard. A discussion was held with our design and product management teams regarding this figure, and we sent the pictures as well as comments you posted to our factory counterparts. Though there is nothing that can be done for this particular character since the production run has been completed, we have notified our counterparts in Asia regarding the errors made with this figure and they will work with the vendors to make sure the best quality product is produced for future characters. For those of you who want to exchange your Angellas (totally understandable), please contact 877-466-2889 to begin the exchange process.
On behalf of Mattel, I apologize for this inconvenience.
Skeletor's Love Child
Well, how about this novel idea. Mattel takes a hit on the profits and sends a Replacement Angella to everyone who received one with messed up eyes... Something called doing the right thing to your customers? I mean we have a Mattel representative mentioning BEST QUALITY PRODUCT... and this is not the first time we've had issues... Roboto, Snout Spout, Goddess, Frosta come to mind... and none of those got replacement... Well, subscribers got a "free figure" after the Frosta issue (It was more to clear up some warehouse space from unsold older stock from other characters, but hey! free figure) If a much smaller company (la-la land records) who really can't afford such a hit can do it, why not the Biggest Toy Maker on the Planet?

Still on the Matty bad news... Multibot was delayed to June... BOOOOOOOO!!!
On May we're getting Blast Attak...
The Customer Service Stock of Rio Blast and Two Bad will be available on Early Access. If any survive EA, they will be available for Day of Sale... There will be an onslaught of folks fighting for Two-Bad, seeing as he was a false exclusive for 2014 (just like Huntara was this year.)

Spirit of King Grayskull was on sale today. He was available for at least an entire hour. I checked the Matty site 3 times during the time he was available...

I did not bite. I just couldn't pull the trigger. I did it with the Hoverbots, Spirit of Hordak, but I just couldn't do it for SoKG... I think he shall be a gap on my collection.

Pandering to the $JWs is now the Marvel Way.

Robert Drake, better known as Iceman is now gay because Social Ju$tice!

Not to mention that Seth McFarlane called it many moons ago.
Now before people start grabbing fabulous Pitchforks and cry Homophobia, MY ISSUE IS NOT ICEMAN BEING GAY. My Issue is how the COMIC HANDLES THE SITUATION!

Jean Grey probes Iceman's mind and basically forces him to out himself to her. She is being a bully, which is bad.

I know many will complain about Iceman being gay after nearly 50-something years of him being a straight character. I get the reasoning, and KINDA agree with them on the idea that this reeks of pandering to $JWs... Had the Iceman being gay been handled in a less cheesy manner, more organically, maybe it would have worked. There HAVE BEEN a few things on some past comics that COULD BE INTERPRETED as hints towards him being gay.
 "But I think you're more...  full gay." 
I still shudder when I read that line. It's making me think Hideo is WAY subtler in his messages. Think about it... Jean is the one who decided that Bobby WAS GAY and pestered him to admit that Jean was correct.

The inspiration to the iceman being gay thing?

At least when they made a Muslim Ms. Marvel, or Miles Morales: Spider-Man, they kept the Originals intact (well, Ultimate Peter died, but Miles is a different character.)
The question is HOW LONG will this change last? I mean the Marvel Universe WILL BE RETCONNED after Secret Wars (2.0) One must also wonder if this is just part of the screw FOX
 and whatever characters they have... End of the F4 Comic, Killing Wolverine and Deadpool...

Apr 21, 2015

Wait, Full House Sequel is not a joke?

What ever happend to predictability? Living with your sister and best friend to help you raise your kids because your husband (Aladdin, NO!) died is not that predictable after your widowed dad raised you and your sisters with help of his former brother-in-law AND his best friend...
Yes, that's right: DJ is pregnant and a widow. She lives with her Aspiring Musician sister, Stephanie... (Michelle is MIA because freaking Olsen Twins think Full House is beneath them.) And Kimmy Gibbler... who surprisingly is NOT a Comedian...
Now here come the twists so it's not a Full House knock-off.
DJ has TWO Boys and a baby in the oven. One is 12 and the other 7. Kimmy has a Teenage Daughter. Uncle Jesse will make some guest appearances... So far no word on Danny, Joey, Jesse's wife Becky, or his twin sons making any appearances...

But it's no joke... Fuller House is real and will be on Netflix...

Yes, the Same Netflix that gave us DareDevil is giving us the "Girl Meets World" treatment for Full House... So far it's only 13 episodes of Fuller House... In the meantime here's a lovely music video with Danny Tanner!

Now you'll never see Comet the same way ever again!!

Apr 20, 2015

It Came from the Toy Chest: The Most Deadbeat Dad in the Universe.

Stock MOC pic of him... not mine
As much as I dislike the Neitlichverse King He-Man; I had to get one... Especially if the December figure is who I believe it is... Dare (to be stupid): The Heir to the Power of He-Man...
So, by some wheeling and dealing, but doing no squealing... I ended up with an used (and incomplete) King He-Man...

He has the Standard MOTUC Articulation... Seeing as he has a lot of shared parts, it makes sense that his articulation is normal. The ab crunch is SLIGHTLY limited due to the cross on the armor. Similar to his father before him.

Paint and Sculpt:
Sculptwise, I mentioned he shares various parts. the head, Armor and Loincloth being the new pieces.
I've discussed how much I hate the design, but I cannot fault the sculptors for a horrible design.

Paintwise, I mentioned that the figure was used. Not sure how much of the issues with the paint are involved with usage or Factory work, but he's pretty decent in that area. (One tiny issue on his loincloth)4.5

Theoretically speaking, he has a Royal Staff and a (busted 200X) Sword, echoing Original MOTUC Randor. Mine only came with the Staff, but luckily I have a Custom Busted 200X Sword as a placeholder until I can get a Shapeways DC Power Sword for him. (Don't like the idea of him running around with a broken sword)
-Damn! I was hot, when I was young!
-You're me?
-Yes, I'm you from the future!
-Man! My fashion sense really stinks in the future. At least it's not Skinny
jeans and a ponytail.
-We went through that phase in the 90s.
Here he gets a 3.5 (this score is assuming the figure had both accessories and the Mini Comic)

King He-Man gets a 4.17 as his score. Of course, we have to remember that my figure is a second hand figure and some small issues lowered part of his score.

Now for the long-winded rant on the nitpicks on the character, not the Toy.

I HATE THE LOOK OF THE CHARACTER. He doesn't look coherent. He has bits of He-Man, Randor, Grayskull and He-Ro tossed in together on a extremely busy design. There is no rhyme or reason for him to have two different versions of his Iron Cross AND He-Ro's H.
Now the Staff, I understand; the sword is confusing me. I get that in the Disgustingly bad Mini Comic, He-Man put the Power Sword Away to rule by peace. My question is:
-OK, young me! Hold the Purple douchebag down while I whack him!
-What did he do?
-He made a deadbeat out of you! er... us!
-Let me tear his arms and whack his gonads with them!
I'm sure anyone of them could have made a sword worthy of a King.
How can I take He-Man Seriously when he runs around with a sword held together by Duct Tape?

Now with Dare coming in December (if the rumors are true) then in 2016 we'd need Skeleteen and an Old Jitsu head...

Personally, I would have made something that looked MORE Like He-Man. I went for the Battle Armor As his Armor because it's an armored look and looks more Kingly than the Flying Fists Armor. It also doubles as a nod to Early on He-Man's career (His first Power-up).
For the crown I went with a more War-like Circlet, because of He-Man's status as brave warrior. Not to mention that Randor's crown would look weird on He-Man. (Also it's a nod to King Conan...)
 Yes, he's wearing the New Adventures pants with He-Ro greaves. The color choices are to keep He-Man's traditional Red and gray from the harness and the golden color matches his bracers.
The Codpiece of the Mattel King He-Man was nice, except for the H. So I removed the H from it and added the Traditional belt, because He-Man. Red cape with Iron cross brooch completes the look. (the red cape is a nod to the 87 movie)

Apr 19, 2015

New Chronicle 2 with Fantastic 4 Skin trailer revealed.

Since trailers have been leaking around like a bad plumbing job, here's 20th Century Fuchs' latest Steaming Pile of Trailer.

It starts with the Inception Bwaaaaah! Because it's what movies do these days... It's like the Late Don LaFontaine's  In a World... trailer cliche...
Followed by the movie stealing the plot from the first Fantastic Four, uh, I mean Tobeyman! (talking about the Norman Osborn not having something ready to show, but this forces Norman to do something Drastic... Only to be quickly changed to avert this cliche by tossing in Miles Teller! who looks too young to play Reed Richards... We're treated to a small snippet of the characters... We even get the whole "Johnny doesn't follow orders well." bit to show he's a rebel!!
Ben Grimm playing baseball to show he's tough... Oh yeah Blogger Doom looks like a total hipster who sits at a San Francisco Starbucks drinking a double iced venti macchiato, while blogging about Male Privilege. By Celestia Kate Mara and Miles Teller have LESS Chemistry than Ioan Gruffudd and Jessica Alba. Choppy scenes cut up with strident sound effects to tell us they got powaz!

"We should use these powers to help people."-Unintentionally Racially Insensitive Johnny Storm.
NO! that's NOT what Johnny Storm would say. Johnny is the one who'd goof off the most with his powers... (one of the very FEW good things that the 2005 movie captured perfectly)

This Serious Johnny is a slap on the face of what it means to be Johnny Storm. This is not Michael B. Jordan's fault, but the scriptwriter's fault. Which shows how much Trank, the writer, and the Fuchs at Fox don't get Fantastic Four.
They Reveal Doom who kinda looks like Colossus' slimmer brother who is wearing a Hobo sheet as a robe.

It's a SMIDGE better than the last teaser, but it still doesn't feel FANTASTIC.

Apr 18, 2015

the Hypocrisy of the end of Sábado Gigante surprises me.

September 2015 will be the end of Sábado Gigante... The perennial Saturday Evening Variety Show for Latin American Audiences is ending in 2015, after a 53 year run. A REALLY REALLY REALLY small part of me is bummed about it ending. 98% of me is like, eh! I barely watched the show so, it's end doesn't affect me. I mean, I DO Remember seeing it back in the 80s...

Do remember some Marvel Secret War Figures on a pillow and bedsheet mountain while the show was on the background... Perhaps a Few MOTU figures every now and then. My late grandma would make some fried cornmeal balls to watch Don Francisco, or hot cocoa...

I think the most recent time I saw the show was in the late 90s...

I don't remember the reason WHY I was even watching, but I DO remember a bunch of senior citizens...

And those two words are KEY here. SENIOR CITIZENS were the core Audience for the show. It astounds me how Facebook and Twitter are full of YOUNG PEOPLE MOURNING the end of Sábado Gigante. If you're under 50 and are mourning the show, then you're very likely to be a hypocrite... There's a FEW exceptions. I'm talking about people who I KNOW don't see the show who are now yelling "WHY!?" to the heavens regarding the cancellation of the show. Those are hypocrites...

In any case, I feel bad for the Old Latin American Folks who will have nothing to watch on Saturday evenings.

Apr 17, 2015

Batman v Superman trailzzzzzzz...

Huh! I'm pancake! I mean, awake!
The Trailer for Law and Order: Super Hero Unit has been released.

So, Zack Snyder didn't disappoint here. He took the brooding and brought it up to the max!
We've seen the Sad Batman, so I won't bring that up... but the trailer does. When we get to the Batman part, we get more brooding... and Simon Gruber narrating. We get a dick measuring contest between Cavill and Affleck. Then the Bat Logo gives the Superman Logo some Surprise Butt Secks!

Boring Trailer is trying to play it safe by keeping a lot of info to itself. It does establish the issue that Earth has now with Superneckbreakerman. The Luthor angle, but no signs of The Facebook Luthor.

This release so close to the Episode VII trailer reeks of Desperation, then again; The WHOLE BVSDoJ reeks of Desperation...

When Marvel is able to make a successful movie with a Raccoon and a Tree as main characters, while DC can barely make a Superman movie; you know something's messed up. 

It Came from the Toy Chest: Self Insertion into MOTUC is no longer exclusive to Neitlich.

No, I didn't get an Official Figure of myself... I'd have to be Neitlich's replacement and I couldn't even get to leave a résumé at the Mattel offices in Puerto Rico... (To this day I'm surprised that there is a Mattel Office in PR.) So, the nightmare of becoming the next ToySpiritualTeacher... or the Bizarro Neitlich were nipped in the bud. But thanks to a Spare Mo-Larr and some paint, I've been able to do a reasonable enough Loosely inspired by me, but with a more Handsome Mo-Larr face. (I had an issue with a Skeletor and the April 2nd sale helped me solve the Skele-issue, but having a Spare Mo-Larr begged for customization.)

Introducing Swordstro: Fallen Eternian Swordmaster!

Real Name: Nathaniel Asher of House Opserc

A former member of the Eternian Palace Guards and skilled Swordsman, who was betrayed by his idol, Lt. John Spector. After the Horde Attack on Eternos, Nefty stole a Cosmic Key Prototype and escaped far into the future. In King Dare's era, he became a rogue time agent and began unraveling time itself. On one of these parallel timelines, he hanged the Vortex suit and became a member of the Great Rebellion. Using a pyromantic sword known as Steel Cutter, Swordstro vows to undo the damage he's done to the timeline once he rids the timeline of John Spector.

The Character design is not that new... I have shown an earlier take of my self-insertion on the Sir Loser Lot review. This is the Pre-Vortex Suit version of my Rogue Time Agent Custom... So, like Neitlich, I added myself into the canon TWICE!!
I did change a few things such as the bracers with gloves (no spare figure with matching bracers that had a flesh color close to Mo-Larr. I added a PG Shoulder Pauldron as a reference to the bio... also a nod to Cloud Strife, but on the right arm because I'm left handed.

This is not as fun ever since Neitlich left Mattel...
Uh. same as Mo-Larr, but with the Demo-Man tunic...(Currently a placeholder item) Which pretty much is the same as Mo-Larr. The Demo-Man vest hinders ab crunch... Sadly, since this figure used the Mo-Larr buck, it has super loose Ankles.

Paint and sculpt:
I suck at painting. so that kinda docks him some points. The sculpt is well... 99.8% from the FourHorsemen. The 0.2% is the beard I sculpted.

1 Draego Sword from the WP#3 and that's it. If I could get an Advent Children Fusion sword, I'd use that, but those Play Arts Kai figures are expensive as hell...

I'm not really going to rate my custom for real, but if I were keeping score, he'd get a 3.0 which means I need to improve on my painting skills... and sculpting skills won't make a Napoleon Dynamite reference skills... But on the other hand I can FINALLY DO THIS!!
Even in Fictional Universes I still am a Hover Hand
MASTER!!! Wait... DAMMIT!!

Apr 16, 2015

Forget Batman s. Superman... The Force has awakened...

In my pants! Oh come on!! The Force awakens, Geekgasms with a new teaser for a new Star Wars movie coming in December... Not making a dick joke would have been impossible for me.

There's the teaser. It shows nothing, save the one scene with Han and Chewie.
That scene there made me shoot first... Again, sorry! I couldn't help myself. At least I didn't follow that line with an IN your face, Han Solo!  That would have made this VERY Awkward... Almost as awkward as it is now after explaining the unused joke... which kinda makes it an used joke and I better shut up now!

In any case, Star Wars is big... and I mean BIG... no dick joke here, honest! For geeks, nerds, Sci-Fi fans... and I mean Sci-Fi fans who write Sci-Fi correctly. and after 2.5 suck-ass prequels, the idea of a new Star Wars that kicks ass and is closer to the Original Trilogy, storywise is something that is VERY WELCOME by fans.

Apr 15, 2015

He-Man and the Review of the Soundtrack!

I mentioned the whole MOTU Soundtrack, a while back. Mine arrived today, BUT it came on a flawed disc. My copy is for some unknown reason on a CD-R Disc instead of a normal CD. I already contacted La-la-land Records for a replacement. As stated by a Representative of La-la-land Records.

If you ordered the set and received Discs with a greenish hue on the back, you should contact them.

Putting that Issue aside, here's the rant, err... Review.

I've no idea how to review a Music CD. I'll start with posting the tracks (copy/pasted from the website)


He-Man (Main Theme) 1:13
Teela’s Theme* 1:27
Orko’s Theme* 1:52
Sweet Dreams* 1:54
Facing the Castle* 1:28
Royal Family* 1:44
Run, Orko, Run* 0:59
The Castle* 2:05
Meditation* 1:47
Orko’s Time Machine* 1:36
Magic Planet* 2:54

He-Man at Home 1:41
Orko Means Well 1:23
He-Man Trapped 1:36
Prince Adam and Teela 1:35
Strangers in the Castle 1:36
Evil-Lyn 1:57
Battle in the Sky 1:04
Queen of the Planet Phantos 1:57
Evil-Lyn Chase 1:21
The Sorceress 1:49
Brave Teela 1:32
Trouble in Grayskull 1:10
Snake Mountain 1:10
Skeletor Chase 1:09
Darkness Falls 0:26
Attack Truck 1:39
Dragon Invasion 1:53
Dragon’s Eggs 1:16
Stone Statue 1:54
Skeletor’s Spaceship 1:11
Farewell 0:19
Beast Man and Skulls 1:21
Magical Orko 0:44
Greatest Show on Eternia 0:09
Circus Parade 1:03
Beast Man 0:36
Desolation 1:34
See You Again 0:16
Attack Truck Fight 0:47
Memories 0:35
Violent Attack (He-Man) 2:04
Memory Loss 1:05
Goodbye (Teela) 0:14
Meteor Attack 1:46
Journey Back in Time 1:51
Book-Man 0:43
Tar Swamp 1:14
Changes 0:43
Bad Attack 1:12
Flash Chase 0:55
Goodbye (Orko) 0:10
Save the Day 1:23
DISC TIME: 69:26

He-Man (Main Theme – full version) 2:41
Story Title (Heroic) 0:09
Story Title (Mysterious) 0:09
From Bad to Worse 0:39
Adam and Orko 1:35
Magical Dragon 0:32
The Game Machine 1:08
Electronic Game 1:07
Villain Plays the Game 0:55
Swordfight 0:43
Octopus Windbag 0:33
Video Game Sting 0:11
Video Battle 1:58
Aliens Attack 3:07
Suspenseful Act-Out 0:15
Good Vibes (He-Man) 0:26
Fanfare 0:13
Story Title (Main Theme) 0:11
Opening A (Main Theme) 0:10
Opening B 0:10
Catch the Lightning 2:04
Happy Times 0:53
The Unknown Planet 0:16
Journey to the Unknown Planet 2:16
He-Man in Space 1:57
Good Guys 2:30
Lute Piece 0:15
Singing Crystal (Remix) 1:22
The Pyramid 1:33
He-Man in the Country 1:14
Marching Guy 0:41
Look for Orko 0:38
Joining Forces 1:22
Quiet Interlude 1:03
A Surprise 0:08
Danger’s Coming 0:20
Bad Guys Attack 1:02
A Near Miss 0:07
End Sting 0:11
Suspense Sting 0:07
Getting Close 0:27
The Fight 1:10
The Munchkins 0:26
Teela Saves the Day 1:22

He-Man (Main Theme – no vocal) 2:04
Book-Man (alternate ending) 0:35
Bad Attack (alternate ending) 1:04
Flash Chase (alternate ending) 1:02
Dragon’s Eggs (alternate ending) 1:21
Circus Parade (alternate ending) 1:11
Beast Man and Skulls (alternate ending) 1:29
Meditation (mono) 1:52
Teela’s Theme (mono) 1:29
Run, Orko, Run (mono) 1:00
Facing the Castle (mono) 1:29
Royal Family (mono) 1:45
Orko’s Time Machine (mono) 1:42
He-Man (Main Theme – Spanish vocal)* 2:04
vocal by Memo Aguirre
DISC TIME: 60:56
*stereo track

Many tracks are super short... There's a few tracks that sound similar to the untrained ear, but they are different, or so I've been told.

The best use you can get out of this is to use the music to make some MOTUC Movies. It has MOST of the music used on the cartoons, from Story title cards, the battle themes, certain character themes, Hell! They even have the theme for the MORAL section... Buuuuuuut! As a child raised with the Latin American dub of He-Man, this set has this:

The $24.98 + S&H question is: IS THIS SET WORTH IT?
If you're not a Filmation fan, then this set is not for you. If you love Filmation's take on He-Man, then why haven't you bought this set already?

Apr 14, 2015

Matty thinks we are suckers...

Or that's how I feel after ordering the Hover Robots, even if I feel they are overpriced.
 Well, today was the day the Hover Robots went on sale via Early Access... (Sold out by the time I started writing)
On the pic to my left you'll see the MOTUC Items on sale... Notice a few odd Items?
The Missing Exclusive Sale Hordak + Imp (Sold out by the time of this rant.)


She was available and some people (not me) ordered her with a set or two of robots.

The site was acting up... It has been a while since it's done that.
But that's not the point. Angella's inclusion is almost a step in the right direction. It saves subscribers a lityle money by allowing a spare Angella to be bought while buying the EA Hover Robots. Instead of THREE Separate shipping charges, now it's only two.

"See Matty is helping us!" Yea,  it helps, but it needed to be 20% cooler... I ran out of RD twenty percent clips, deal with it!

But the true Potential of Early Access is not being achieved because of the Digital River shackles. For Early Acces,  we need sonething like say:

You know the emails that Matty sends each month telling you about your subscription renewal. There is where they should put a link to the early acces page to allow you to add more stuff to your monthly order.

Like this month, you got the email about Angella and the map; then it should give you the EA link to add the EA items like Glimmer, or the Robots. That way the customer can save a little money that could be used to buy MORE product.

I have to give them kudos for the good (even if I believe this was an accident.) But I'm still a bit miffed about the overall cost of the robots plus shipping.

I think they think we're suckers is because they KNOW we'll buy the product. Since they are the only ones who MAKE MOTU Products that action figure collectors who happen to be MOTU fans will buy. That's how they got away with the overpriced Hover Robots. I feel a bit dirty now.

Apr 13, 2015

Looking back on the NA Screwjob in MOTUC

We're almost halfway through 2015 and we pretty much KNOW what's coming to round off the year... Including the infamous Final Slot going to Dare as Neitlich's Final Screw you! to the fans...

So, This rant will be a long winded post showing how NA's roster could have EASILY fit in Classics and we could have easily completed ALL 3 Vintage Eras of MOTU by December 2015.

Let's look at the Actual MOTUC Rosters from 2008-2015

(SDCC) King Grayskull (Continental US only)

(SDCC) He-Ro

OK, so 2008-2009 was a VERY Vintage year and the odd figures out were pretty much repaints of other characters made NEW Characters.

Trap Jaw
Evil Lyn
(Sub) Wun-Dar
Count Marzo
(SDCC) Mo-Larr vs Skeletor
(SDCC) Orko and Prince Adam
Buzz Off
(Beast) Battle Cat
(Beast) Tytus
(Variant)BA He-Man
(Variant) Keldor
(Extra) Santa KG

We got our First NA Figure in Optikk. (Made me a New Adventures convert) and so far no real figures that could have been culled for a New Adventures slot... Except Maybe Gygor for Sagitar, but Gygor's reuse for 2011's Shadow Beast kinda makes up for his existence. Santa KG I allowed because he allows customers outside Continental US to get a KG figure.

(Sub) Preternia Disguise He-Man
King Hsss
Faceless One
(SDCC) Queen Marlena and Cringer
Snout Spout
Demo Man
(Variant)BA Skeletor
(Variant)BG Teela
(Variant)Hurricane Hordak
(Variant) BG Evil Lyn
(Beast)Shadow Beast
(Beast)Swift Wind
(extra)Palace Guards
(extra)CG Weapons Rack
(extra)BP She-Ra
(extra) Wind Raider

Lookee here! 4 Slots that could have been used for other figures AND ALLOW some slots for New Adventures characters. Vikor, Demo-Man, BP She-Ra and BG Evil Lyn slots could have gotten better usage and allowed for a few NA Slots in order to complete that era on 2015. Let's face it: BGEL was a Blunder, plain and simple. To make matters more insulting, this led to the creation of an EXTRA Slot for She-Ra with Horse riding abilities that should have been a normal variant slot.

(sub) Shadow Weaver
Kobra Khan
Horde Prime
(SDCC) Vykron
(Beast)Star Sister 3 Pack
(Beast) Griffin
(Beast)Snakemen 2 pack
(Variant)TP He-Man
(variant)SM MAA
(Variant)DB Skeletor
(Variant)Filmation Randor
(extra)Temple of Darkness Sorceress

This year we have 3 slots that could have been better used to allow us to complete NA in 2015.
I'm talking about Vykron, SM MAA(Who I enjoy) and Temple of Darkness Sorceress.
As you can see I'm not counting the 2012 "Club 30th" because that Themed sub was a failure as a celebration of 30 years of He-Man. That sub could have been used to promote prototypes or concepts of figures from past eras. (MOTU, POP, NA, 200X)

Fang Man
(Sub)King He-Man
Clamp Champ
(SDCC) Comet Warriors Stonedar and Rokkon
(Beast/Variant)Fighting Foe Men 3 Pack
(Beast/Variant) NA He-Man
(Beast/Variant)Horde Troopers
(Extra)Sky Sled and Sky High
(Extra)Weapons Pak #4 (with Kowl)
(Extra)Castle Grayskull
(Extra)Spirit of Hordak

Here we have FIVE slots that could have been used to help New Adventures have a complete roster by 2015. the Questionable slots are:
Spirit of Hordak, Fighting Foemen 3 pack, Geldor, Plundor, and King He-Man. The craziest thing is that one of those slots is a 3 Pack slot... So that's like getting 7 slots in one year!
I guess you noticed that I didn't mention Standor. Same reason I didn't mention Mo-Larr on 2010. The budget for Standor and Mo-Larr came from another company.

I'm not touching Club Filmation because Filmation had NOTHING to do with NA.

(SDCC)Filmation Hordak
Rio Blast
(Beast/Variant)Battle Lion
(Beast/Variant) NA Skeletor
(extra)Kowl and Loo-Kee
(extra)Battle Ram

Here we have two to three slots that could have been used better to help complete NA in 2015. UNO and Filmation Hordak are the two main "iffy slots" the third would be Goatman.
Like past Mini subs, I'm not touching Club Etheria, because it's needed to complete PoP. (which is a load of crap, but that's not the topic of this rant)

Now for 2015. I will name the characters we know so far but we don't have a set in stone date for ALL of them.

Blast Attak
(Rumored) Dare
(Beast/Variant)SA He-Man vs 200X Hsss
(Beast/Variant)FFHe-Man vs TCSkeletor)
(Beast/Variant)BS Hordak
(extra/SDCC)Laser Power He-Man vs Laser Light Skeletor
(extra/SDCC)Rotar vs Twistoid
(extra) Point Dread with Filmation Teela
(extra)Skeletor Hover Robots
(extra)Spirit of King Grayskull

Here we have 5 slots that could have been used to complete NA. The slots are:
Lizardman, Dare, Oo-Larr, BS Hordak, and Spirit of King Grayskull. Before you say:
But Nefty, BS Hordak is needed to complete the complete vintage MOTU roster for normal figures...

Let me remind you that we have gotten 2 additional Hordak variants that were kind of unneeded. You could have taken Buzz Saw Hordak and combined it with Filmation Hordak and call it a day, then use the slot from Spirit of Hordak for something else!

Let's count the number of mismanaged slots:
3-4 in 2011
3 in 2012
5 in 2013
2-3 in 2014
5 in 2015

Taking the smallest number of slots on each year the result is: (3+3+5+2+5)=18
Now let's see how many New Adventures characters are missing:

Mutants: (5 to 6)

Galactic Protectors: (7 to 9)

Wait... Going with NA characters who had a Toy in the vintage NA line we have 12 slots... Leaving 6 slots open... That means that we could have completed ALL 3 MAIN TOYLINES IN 2015 WITHOUT a Mini sub for POP!! Notice that I still counted the FFM as ONE Slot, which means that completing NA would have been a lot easier,,,
But, since we have Cartoon characters involved, like Mara, then we must use the larger numbers that take Crita, Sebrian and Prototype Darius in consideration. That gives us 15 slots. Still well under the 18 slots that we theoretically have. Most of the Galactic Protectors could be made with creative part reuse. (Artilla and Sagitar being the exceptions) Hell, some mutants could benefit from parts reuse if it means getting them!

I bet some of you could complain about "Axing mini comic characters"... which I only killed a NON-Variant figure, Geldor. Going with the Toy Only NA roster, the PoP sub would have been unnecessary and would have given us a mini sub slot for mini comics folks like Geldor, or the much cooler character, Lodar.

The saddest part of having 15 New Adventures Characters MIA is that  we won't see half of them making it to the 2016 rebranded line.

Spidey Reboot Spidey Reboot No origin movie for the Spidey Reboot

We got some news on the Spidey Reboot. Some of it spoiled in the title of the rant... The rest will be discussed here. Y'all know that I'm against changing the races or genders of fictional characters because SOCIAL JU$TICE!! I'm still worried that they will change Parker's ethnicity because "reasons". I am also not a fan of High School Peter Parker once again.

I get why Marvel is doing the Teenaged Parker as Spidey. That way they can keep him around for more movies. Not to mention that it would be more impressive seeing the teen beat smarter and older opponents. At the same time I so don't want him to play "The Rookie" in Avengers.

The scariest part is:
We’ve already designed the costume, which is different than any of the ones that have come before. And yet ours is classic Spidey, as I think you’ll see.
So, I'm guessing this means one thing:

That's right! The only Classic Spidey element missing from modern suits is making a comeback... Of course this is baseless speculation inspired by the bold part on the quote. Think about it... It's the only thing that makes sense.

Now we wait until we get news of Parker being cast and reveals from the suit.

Apr 11, 2015

It Came From the Toy Chest: Funko does what Hasbro won't... now in Blind bag size!

Q in Pony form has been made available for a while in the blind box mini Scale Funko Vinyl statues...

Like the Larger Discord Statue I got a while back, now I have a Mini Discord that is compatible with the MLP  Blind Bag Figures.

There is not much to say about it, I mean it's a Tiny Discord Statue.
Here he is next to a Rainbow Magic Game Playing piece... or is it Blind Bag Pinkie Pie?
Take a guess!

In any case you can see the Size Comparison between Blind Bag Ponies from Hasbro and the Blind Box Discord... Which BTW has 1/12 chance of showing up AND you can't tell because the Statue is sealed within a black bag encased in a Box. Then there's the "Black" Discord who has 2/12 chances of showing up...
Luckily he was my THIRD Funko Blind Box MLP item. The other two were Black Big Mac and Black Twilight Sparkle.

Curiously enough, the paintjob on him is so much better than the Larger Statue.

I must comment on his pose. This one is more intense and dynamic than the Schemer pose of the larger statue. In any case I HAVE A DISCORD!!

With it being a statue, I cannot rate it like an Action Figure.

Apr 10, 2015

Jared Leto triggers a bunch of people... and other stuff

Remember the time a bunch of SJWs got their panties in a bunch because of a Batgirl cover?
 The one that they threatened the artist and he folded to them.
The SJWs whined about Triggers and abuse, Soggy Knees and the usual stuff.

The Controversial cover was a tribute to the Controversial Story known as The Killing Joke.

Well, Jared Leto's first Pic as the Joker was revealed and guess what?

The Picture IS A FREAKING TRIBUTE TO THE KILLING JOKE!! It's Perfect! This should rustle the jimmies of all those SJWs... But chances are it won't  because they don't care about the medium at all.

Speaking of Social Justice Stupidity... Remember the mess with the Milo Manara Spider-Woman cover? The one where she is doing a normal Spider-Person pose and SJWs went with Soggy Knee rants Sexisms and other junk. Claiming that it never happened with Spider-Man...

Well, there's a new storm inspired by that cover.

So, Frank Cho drew a mock cover of Spider-Gwen Crawling over a building similar to the (in)famous Manara cover.SJWs felt butthurt and whined. This led Cho to mock them with a Harley Quinn mock cover doing the same pose.

Cho's management of the situation was pure genius... That is not over. Now the "creator" of "Spider-Gwen" threatened Cho because of that mock cover.

Before I start commenting on that bit of news...
This Robbi Rodriguez calls himself creator of Spider-Gwen... As in Gwen Stacy (created in the 60s by Stan Lee and Steve Ditko IIRC) with the powers of Spider-Man Created in the 60s by Stan Lee and Steve Ditko. This piss-stain dares to call himself a creator, when all he did was take a Power set created in the 60s by other people and put them on a different character created by other people.
That's a really bad fanfic scenario or a What If? Issue. Huh? what's this!? There already WAS a What If? comic where other people instead of Parker got bitten by the spider? All the way back to the 70s?

This douche dares to call himself a "creator" by copying a concept already established by other people and using characters already established by other people. This is as creatively bankrupt as you can get. I call dibs on Venom Burglar's ghost! Basically the ghost of the Burglar bonded with a ghostly form of a Venom Symbiote Fragment.

Now that I got that out of the way, the dillweed verbally threatens Cho in a childish manner...
I won't make fun of his "You're written as your" because that's the low hanging fruit.
Calling Gwen Stacy his child and the cover art "Dirty pics" is laughable...

One Internet Search Later: 
Robbi Rodriguez does not know what "dirty pics" are. The Internet HAS Dirty pics of Spider-Gwen. That Cho piece IS Extremely tasteful. Hopefully Rodriguez will not look for Spider-Gwen images with safe search turned off. Otherwise his achy breaky heart might kill him.

Political Correctness taken to the max will doom us all... I'm still waiting for the controversial Aunt May ass in the air cover poopstorm to start.

Apr 9, 2015

Thing looks thing-like and Archangel is coming.

We saw Deadpool's costume for Deadpool and some of our faith was restored with Fox...
Now We've gotten reveals for X-Men: Apocalypse's Archangel... With Technorganic wings and Archangel looking armor.
I do have Two Tiny Nitpicks about it...

-Black and Grey... What is it with X-Movies and super muted costumes for muties?
I could take the suit being mostly black, but it needs some reddish elements to make it look somewhat faithful to the source Material...

-Lack of Altered Skintone for the actor. I'm not asking for BLUE here... Maybe some undead looking grey for Archangel to look more "Death-like" seeing as he is often considered the Horseman of Death for Apocalypse.

Let's talk Chronicle 2: With Marvel Characters. As much as it pains me to say this: The Thing Looks good! The colors seem a bit muted, but he looks like The Thing... Shame that the rest of the movie isn't looking as well... 733tHaxx0RzDrD00M and all the other crap...

Right now I'm feeling lukewarm about X-Men, not that much better for Not So Fantastic 4, but Deadpool, man...
It's looking mostly great... I kinda wish Wade's face was a bit more messed up, but at least this time we ARE getting the comic book accurate suit!

Apr 8, 2015

The Topangaborn gets a new Teacher...

Just like her father did before her... Yes, I mean that Literally. The Topangaborn gets a new teacher just like her father did before her... She's getting the same new teacher her father did!!

That's right! Anthony Tyler Quinn will be back for the new Season of Girl Meets World with his old role of Jonathan Turner, Teacher and Shawn Hunter's temporary Legal Guardian.

Now here's the thing: It's good to see him back because he's a teacher and having Mr. Matthews be Riley's teacher 4 life is a bit creepy. This also makes Cory AND Mr. Turner to be equals on the field (though Turner has a bit more experience) Wonder if the show will echo the Feeny/Turner dynamic with Turner and Cory.

It's a bad thing because we're bringing peripheral Boy Meets World characters to Girl Meets World.
Mr. Turner was more of a "Shawn-related" character than anything. Focusing on Peripheral Boy Meets World characters will dilute Girl Meets World. This is Riley's world now, not Cory's.

We know that Angela is coming... and I've ranted before about peripheral characters.

While I did not include Topanga's side of the family, you can see what I mean. I kept Shawn close to Riley's world, because we know that Cory + Shawn 4 Evah! Minkus is closer because Farkle but every other possible BMW character that is NOT a relative of Riley is a peripheral BMW character to Girl Meets World. The further we get from Riley and her world, we lose the point of the show.

Seems like a Great time to be a MOTU fan!

I normally bitch and moan about how little support Masters of the Universe has from Mattel. This time I'm not going to be bitching, but instead point out some good stuff that is coming our way.

I will be posting the links to the sales pages of the items I'll talk about, but I am NOT affiliated in any way to them. This is more of a MOTU fan helping out other MOTU fans thing.

The Soundtrack to He-Man and the Masters of the Universe Animated Series from the 80s (Filmation, duh!)
It's a Limited Edition 2 Disc set full of Filmation Music. Including the cool Battle Music that hasn't been released in disc form before. It even includes

I guess that I'll be able to make a MOTU Gym Mix and lose some weight now... Maybe I'll pump some iron... Cue Ahnuld... 

The Art of He-Man and the Masters of the Universe. It's a Book!

Full of Masters of the Universe Art from Mattel AND with collaboration from the Unofficial MOTU Historians of The Power and Honor Foundation!!
Cue Marty!
That would be an interesting read... And a kickass display piece if you get the exclusive version with a Castle Grayskull shaped case.

But Like The Princess of Friendship said, BOOKS!! There is another book coming!
What do I mean ALL of the Mini Comics?
Well, I mean ORIGINAL MOTU Mini Comics from the 80s
Princess of Power Mini Comics from the 80s
(New Adventures of) He-Man Mini Comics from the late 80s
and the Neitlich penned Awful MOTUC Mini Comics from the 10s that make Tommy Wiseau look look like Shakespeare. Nothing Personal against Neitlich, it's just that his writing is Badong!

Not to mention that we've been getting a DC Comic that has gotten better than when I reviewed some in here. Some cool looking art pieces like the busts, or the Small Castle Grayskull and Snake Mountain... All we need is the movie, a cartoon, a videogame AND some figures at retail and we're set!

Apr 7, 2015


Unoriginal rant title for a kinda review of Disney's (and Marvel's but they don't want you to know that) Big Hero 6.
Let's start with the Basics... BH6 is a spin-off of a spin-off of a Marvel Comic...

Since the X-Folk are trapped with 20th Century Fox... Disney had to do a little scrubbing to the BH6 concept...

We lost the two better known members of the team: Sunfire and Silver Samurai. We also lost Japan, but got a Hybrid of Tokyo and San Francisco. The importance of Japan for Big Hero 6 is that in the SOURCE MATERIAL, BH6 is the Official Japanese Superhero team... Composed of Japanese people... But Disney changed that...
The Full Japanese team was switched and replaced with A Latin American Girl, an African American guy, a Caucasian guy, a Kinda Asian-ish Girl but a bit vague so she can be mixed race and led by a Very Caucasian looking Asian-ish boy. Where is the Whitewashing Outrage from the SJWs? This team was made completely out of a minority, but they replaced the cast with other races. This is something for them to make outrages that would reach the mainstream media... Oh wait! That would have actually required for them to read the original comics, or care enough about comics to demand that Hollywood would have kept the original Minority cast intact...

But they were probably too busy demanding to change actual Caucasian comic book characters into minorities or women because, Social Justice...

Now, with the whole Weird SocJus redesigns, I got to say that the cast was pretty interesting...

Hiro was a Supah Ninja, He played George Takei's grandson...

Gogo Tamago was a Real World cast Member... She also was in an abominable movie.

Fred, well he can Train your Dragon... Wait, no Dragon trailer? He's playing Weasel on Deadpool.

Wasabi... He's a Wayans... Son of Blankman... He played a young David Alan Greer

Last but not least Honey Lemon... who I've got nothing to post or make references... to, except her father, Famous Venezuelan singer José Luis Rodríguez, better known as El Puma.

Also a Viagra Spokesman.

So, Disney took a huge dump on the source material that would make Jeff Goldblum's big pile look tiny. Somehow this actually did NOT RUIN the movie. Seeing as all the backstory was tied to a certain X-Series and the rights to cinematic X-stuff is on Fox's paws; they had to improvise.
It was an enjoyable experience, even if it denied its Marvel Roots as hard as it could. It was great for kids to watch and not mind numbingly annoying for adults. I'm trying to not spoil anything since this movie is not deserving of my play by play snark-athon!

I will admit that the story has a LOT of Superhero movie cliches and if you're into science the suspension of disbelief will not be easy for you.

It's not a perfect movie, but a rather enjoyable one. I'd say 7 out of 10. I wanted to like it more, but I couldn't. 

Also 80s Leonardo and MYP He-Man...

Apr 4, 2015

My Little Season 5: Communism is Evil

Looks like the time of Pony has returned for it's fifth season. The Cutie Mark Magic Toys have been around in stores and I've avoided them like the plague because of their ridiculous gimmick...
My Little Snowglobe Mane 6... Meh! Gimme a Big McIntosh instead. Or at least the upcoming Canterlot Playset (ouch!) that looks awesome!

My thoughts about it? It started OK, but fell flat.
Random notes:
Villain Pony, Starlight Glimmer... Second Evil Pony with a Twilight Sparkle derivative name...
Also, voiced by Kelly Sheridan, who is known for voicing:
-Deranged Barbie on Barbie: Ripping off She-Ra's Tagline: the movie.
-Barbie on the Barbie Pony movie and a few others
-Sango on Inuyasha
-G3 Cheerilee
-X-Men EVOLUTION Scarlet Witch
-One of the humans in Hamtaro... wait! This is the first time I mention Hamtaro in the House of rants!!

Hamtaro dance time bitches!!
-Ukyo Kuonji on Ranma 1/2...
-Melody on My Little Pony Tales!?

Nothing wrong with those smiles...
Holy crap! We got a G2 VA!?

Communism song wasn't that great... Oh my Celestia! I think I figured out WHY I disliked this Season Opener... Starlight Glimmer is an SJW Pony... Think about it...
-Flies under the Equality banner, even if she doesn't truly believe it.
-Castrates creativity, talents, uniqueness because "OPPRESHUN" (Seriously, the baker pony in SJW village couldn't bake anything other  than horrible tasting muffins because it could offend those who can't bake well.)
-Also, using the thought police to stop dissenters.

OK, so I kinda liked that a Feminist Show dared to attack the SJW methods by using this character (Starlight Glimmer); this was not exactly Season Opener material.

Season 1: Meet the cast and stop the Evil Nightmare Moon from Ruling Equestria in Eternal night... (Not to mention destroy the world due to plants needing sunlight to live.)

Season 2: The Mane 6 have to stop the Ressurrected Discord (god) of Chaos from turning Equestria into a chaotic world/wasteland

Season 3: The Ancient Crystal Empire reappeared and the Mane 6 have to stop the Evil Influence of King Sombra from enslaving the rest of the world with his dark magic.

Season 4: The newly arisen Princess Twilight, with the help of the Mane 6 need to stop the Evil Vines from destroying Equestria and sacrifice the Elements of Harmony to save the world.

Season 5: The Mane 6 debunk an SJW pony and free a town from this SJW pony...

One of these things is not like the others. I kinda get that they're trying to use the theme that not all villains need to be some monster (thanks to the not so subtle Rainbow Dash monster references), but they could have saved her for mid season... or simply used the Smooze here. Or, maybe my enjoyment of MLP is waning...

Apr 3, 2015

Aerith Gainsborough: A Rant on Positive Female characters.

Art may seem a bit tasteless right now but bear with me. Also
This piece of art is not mine. I know where it came from originally
but it was on the used PSP I bought after mine died.

The Flower Girl from the Slums who is VERY FAMOUS for being murdered by a Momma's Boy's Mom cosplaying as her son IS A VERY POWERFUL AND POSITIVE FEMALE CHARACTER.

But she's a damsel in distress and dies at the end of the first disc! How can she be a Powerful Female character?

Yes, it's true that when you meet her, you have to save her from Shin-Ra and a little bit later on you have to save her from Shin-Ra, AGAIN... But Hear me out...
She also wears a Pink Dress and a Huge Pink Bow. She is also the weakest character if we use the Physical Strength stat for measuring strength. Why do I believe she is Powerful AND POSITIVE Female Character?

Let's start with her background story... which is irrelevant if I wear Plaid shirts and Hula Hoops on my ears.

She's the last surviving member of an Ancient race... (Technically a Half-Breed) who can communicate with Mother Earth... (and she's not a tribal or aboriginal stereotype that according to SJWs is something saved for "People of Color"... which sounds incredibly racist having a bunch of SF "White Privileged folks" referring to black people as "People of Color"...)

Now what makes her powerful and dare I say Positive.
-She is strong.
 Before you point out that I called her the weakest character based on attack power and that she has to be rescued, shut up and read. Growing up on the Midgar slums is supposed to be tough. There are random encounters with monsters in every corner, not to mention thieves and potential rapists. Not to mention the Shin-Ra being after her.

Not only that, but she is headstrong and has a tendency to protect others before worrying about herself.
Most obvious example is going to the City of the Ancients to activate Holy (and meeting her demise) then we have two other instances in which she puts her life on the line in order to save others.

-Wall Market: Operation Rescue Tifa from Don Corneo
Ah yes, the section of the game that has Cloud going around getting stuff to crossdress in order to save Tifa. (Cloud may or may have not been raped when he passes out at the Brothel.)
Aerith offers herself to get inside Corneo's compund (since he has a thing for young pretty girls) to try and get Tifa out of there. She did this for a complete stranger and possible rival for her. (The whole Cloud, Tifa, Aerith odd triangle, or trapezoid if the possibility of dating Yuffie )

-When she surrendered herself to the Shin-Ra to protect Marlene.
To protect the daughter of a stranger. she basically traded her life to protect this little girl.

She is a SELFLESS PROTECTOR who is willing to die to protect others. This is also reflected in her Limit Breaks:

Healing Wind: It restores the Party's HP (about half the max HP)

Seal Evil: Stops Evil in its tracks. (or applies Paralyze and Silence on them)

Breath of the Earth: Removes any Negative Status effects on the party

Fury Brand: Fills the other Party Members' Limit Gauge

Planet Protector: Gives Temporary Invincibility to the party.

Pulse of Life: Fully restores HP and MP while removing Negative Status effects on the party

Great Gospel: A combination of Planet Protector and Pulse of Life.

As you can see 6 out of her 7 Limit Breaks affect the Player Party. Only Seal Evil has an effect on the enemies AND IT DEALS NO DAMAGE to them. Again. this emphasizes her Protective nature.

She is also the upbeat character who tries to cheer up the party, as seen when the group reaches The Golden Saucer for the First time. Or even tease Cloud (in drag) when they attempt to rescue Tifa.

Even After her Death, she's been protecting and aiding the party.
She supposedly helped Cloud and Tifa when they fell in the Lifestream and ended up on Mideel... You know Xenogears referencing wheelchair bound Cloud and the whole diving into Cloud's mind... Aerith helped there too (based on events on the novella Hoshi wo Meguru Otome)

She helps the Planet by controlling Holy (Just like "Sephiroth controlled JENOVA") to stop Meteor. Helped Cloud a couple of times during the GeoStigma incident (Advent Children). Not to mention Healing ALL of the afflicted by Geostigma at the end of AC, or "helping Kadaj return to the Planet".

I see her as a positive female character because of her character. She doesn't need a Huge rack, short short skirt and Mad Kung Fu Skills to be powerful... Unlike other FFVII character who shall not be mentioned...

She is girly, yes, has been in distress, yes, wears obvious gender signifiers, yes, she Kinda is a Voodoo Priestess/Tribal Sorceress, and one could argue she kinda was a reward with the whole Date Sidequest and how Cloud got involved with acting as Bodyguard... Cue Whitney Houston Music... and is a combination of a bunch of things wrong with women, if we believe the words of a loathsome media critic who makes Pinocchio look like the Element of Honesty.

Despite all of these "flaws", Aerith becomes a Memorable character, and not simply because "she dies".  To think of her simply as Kebab Girl is a disservice to the character. (Something that I'm guilty of from time to time in the name of snark) She is memorable because of her character, actions, and that we can empathize with her. (Without needing to be the last of an ancient civilization who could talk to the planet) 

Seriously, she's the Obi Wan Kenobi of Final Fantasy VII... But in the body of a 22 year old Flower Peddler.

But, I'm sure that She who won't be named will just focus on the dying and the pink clothes to complain and not say what's a positive character...

She did a new video? AWWW DAMMIT!!

So, Princess Plaid (not wearing plaid for once... *gasp!*) claims that This Female Link Knock-Off, known as the Scythian is a Positive Female Character. She also praises the game she comes from for it's simple Point and Click controls... but that's a different rant. (*grumble* point and click action games take control away from the player*grumble*) Let's look at this character.
So, That mess of pixels is a female. The game has to tell you it's a female so you know. Then again, those yellow buttons and brown larger squares look like weird Atari Boobs.
Has the same non-personality as the "Silent Protagonist" from many old school games that kinda forces these characters to be empty shells so the player can inject THEIR OWN PERSONALITY.

We had Bridged the chasm & we felt Super Smart... Putting a log on top of a cliff to make a bridge to cross a chasm ON A VIDEOGAME is worth this much patting on the back? Is it me or does it sound a bit condescending to the gamer?

Funny thing is that this non-character is looking for 3 Golden Triangles, has a sword and shield, little to zero personality and a weird unnatural enemy.  The only difference is that Link is male and the original. Also, Link doesn't die in the end after growing weaker. Let's leave this sink in for a moment.

It’s not just in the visual sense that the Scythian lacks clear definition. We know very little about her history, and nothing about why she has undertaken the quest to defeat an ancient evil. While games often give us images of heroes who are fated to defeat evil forces, it’s rare for these heroes of myth to be women. Like many video game heroes, the Scythian is essentially a silent protagonist, a figure defined primarily by her actions, which makes her a blank slate for all players to project themselves onto.
So how is having ZERO History or character on this character make this a positive role?
Unlike the deaths of so many female characters in games which serve the purpose of fueling the development of male characters, the Scythian’s death is tragic because her life had intrinsic value. We projected ourselves onto her and experienced the world through her.
 Her life had no real value, BECAUSE she has no background, no personality, nothing that was intrinsically HERS. We do not need to project ourselves into the characters to experience the world through them. By doing so we are ROBBING the Character from being a character instead of an empty shell.
In the game’s final moments, we see the people of the region pay their respects to the Scythian, and we mourn her death along with them.
 All two of them...
She didn’t just exist in relation to another character—she wasn’t just somebody’s wife or sister or daughter–but rather, she existed as an individual, and as a hero.
If she existed as an individual, and a hero, then her being a woman is irrelevant, right?
The game’s ending suggests that the Scythian will not be forgotten by the other characters, and the visuals and music work together to elicit a complex assortment of emotions, a sense of celebration of the Scythian’s courage, and a sense of grief at her death.
 Well, being the THIRD Human being on the entire game will make this husk a bit less forgettable. Now why will she not be forgotten? Is it because of her non-existent story, personality, motivations?
While the necessity of the Scythian’s sacrifice is worked into Sword & Sworcery’s story from the beginning and lends this particular game an emotional weight its quest might otherwise lack, we certainly don’t want all female heroes to be tragic ones. But we do need more women-centric stories of all kinds.
So, why not MAKE these stories instead of whining about not having enough? You got nearly half a million dollars Last December... Put your money where your mouth is.
When archetypal fantasy heroes in games are overwhelmingly portrayed as men, it reinforces the idea that men’s experiences are universal and that women’s experiences are gendered, that women should be able to empathize with male characters but that men needn’t be able to identify with women’s stories.
 Gamers are able to empathize with characters as long as the story is good. After the shocking reveal of Samus being a woman nearly 30 years ago, we still empathize with her adventures, same thing with Lara Croft. Or in the spirit of the original rant, Aerith. This logic that men need male characters to empathize is ass backwards.
Sword & Sworcery gives us a female protagonist and encourages us to see her as a hero first and foremost, one who also just happens to be a woman.
Can't have it both ways. Either her being a woman is important (because "we need more women-centric stories") or it's not... ("the game encourages us to see her as a hero first and foremost, one who also just happens to be a woman.")

Seven Months for a seven minute video? You Really are trying to make Georgie Slow Assed RR Martin look like a Cheetah... Is this video 1 of topic 4 of the 12 topics that you were supposed to have finished by December 2012? Sheesh!